Passion and Sustainability

One should only do what they are truly passionate about. Be it writing, singing, dancing, healing, baking or solving. There are those among us who are forced into situations, into choices by necessity or disillusion. They think it is the right thing to do and the right way to do it. In the process, they are unable to continue working for their chosen cause with fervor or any joy. It becomes a daily struggle, a strain to complete day-to-day tasks simply because it is required of them, not because they want to do it.

 

All of us have ventured down this uneven path at one time or the other. Sometimes we are smart enough to realize this is not for us and other times we are unable to see how tedious something may become for us and not for another. If we can wise up, we can change our route. Move towards something better and rewarding and in the long run perhaps attain happiness. It can take some time, maybe even decades till one can isolate what they would be happy doing for the rest of their lives.

 

Until then, the mad race of academics rages on. The right hook of resumes and left hook of emotional blackmail seem to battle it out in the environment around us. Changing paths and alliances because of your relationships is frankly embarrassing and juvenile. Deciding to support an organization because everyone else around you is writing it down on their CV is a bad reason. There is no doubt that you may be very helpful, that your support may be integral. But once you leave, once you are not around anymore can that organization sustain itself? Can it manage to meander through time and continue to exist with the same zeal if not more?

In all probability, maybe not. It has been my  personal experience, that if someone is enchanted by an idea and is enamored by its existence in their life then that idea will not only succeed it will continue to endure through to the end as long as other lovers follow their heart to it. Philanthropists, entrepreneurs, social activists, businessmen and their successful counterparts have one thing in common- their passion for their chosen field.

 

What I see around me frightens me at times. I see people championing a cause because they feel obliged to do so. Ask them a question about the cause, and watch them flounder. I see people joining others to add another bullet point to their resume and then to just barely get by. I see my friends guilt everyone around into donating, or joining an event simply heeding the here and now. Noone seems to be doing anything because they want to, or because they believe in it. I fear that many of the changes we tout will become blurred over due course, and their effects will die away with them as time passes. And I hope I am incorrect.

 

Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, you feed a community for a lifetime.

 

 

Levels

Over the last few months I’ve made it very clear to myself that through soul searching it is a good idea to weed out those facets that are flawed to improve myself. It isn’t always easy to accept that you may be in the wrong and the bitter medicine that comes with it has a nasty dose. 

One thing I managed to hone on was the level of elitism I feel that I have. This has nothing to do with the kind of friends I have or the type of company I keep but on how well I connect with someone and let them in. It has something like a step ladder connotation. If I connect with you on 4 levels, and someone else on 2 or one, I will consider myself very different from the latter. 

These levels are very unique. They aren’t superficial such as “Oh have you read this book? Me too!” or “I love the same soccer team as you! Let’s bond!”. In fact some of the greatest friends I have ever made have had such differing interests that it baffles me how we even got to talking. 

These levels have variations. For example, if you speak perfect English I will automatically hold you in higher regard. I sound snobby, and completely elitist. Believe me, I am well aware of it. I don’t like it either. I think it stems from the fact that my Urdu is so horrible that I would never be able to hold, sustain a conversation that would be interesting to the both of us. It would be very, perfunctory. 

Another thing. If someone is well-read it is immediately another level right there. I don’t care what you read, as long as you read. I hate it when people tell me that books are boring and that TV Shows and Movies can easily compensate. I pride myself on being well-read, speed-reading and my creativity. I get all that from the books I read. By breaking books down from their possibility to the mere ink and paper that formed them, you’ve done me a great grievance. I’m sure that you’re a great person, but come on, pick up a book once in a while it won’t kill you. 

Another level that would certainly help is having travelled. I’ve met people who go ape over the fact that I have travelled a lot. I hate how they pick jokes about it and act like I’m boasting about something that actually was a matter-of-fact scenario. “Aap boat cool hain key aap Singapore ghoom car ayee hain?” (How cool are you that you’ve travelled through SIngapore?) How do you respond to that. Automatically I feel uncomfortable and don’t know what the  right thing to say is. 

Class. I don’t mean the derogatory system of Brahmins and Untouchables. I mean sophistication, grace. Having carriage and good social skills. Being able to hold ones own in every situation possible or at least adapt to different situations gives people my respect. I don’t even know how to explain this one better. 

Overall, this would come to a pretty set standard of a person I would get along with, open up to and bond with. It isn’t about being the best person, and it isn’t about being the most refined, intelligent or of the same background. Its about pacing and being on the same level as someone. To understand where they are coming from and know that whatever I say would be understood in the context I meant it. 

I’m working on the wall this may create with certain people. I try to be overly friendly sometimes so that I don’t come off as a snob. I try to be even more endearing, I bite back snide comments that would be taken as harsh, I avoid situations where it would seem that I am above it all. I talked this over with a friend of mine, and she thought that it was all in my head. But even so, it affects my outlook on life. On the way I interact with someone, with boundaries, restraints. It shapes how permanent I want any relationship to be. If we don’t “click” me not seeing you a year later wouldn’t hurt. But if we do click, and we do have those gelling points, I would be shattered to see you go. 

Maybe it has to do with who I let in and how much. I make all my relationships for the long-haul, maybe thats why it takes so many steps till I meet someone on the same playing field. And then that person, becomes special. 

Do I really need to stop thinking like this?